Traipsing Taipinoy 09 - Boracay Sports Edition

An account written by Muhammad Aly s/o Musa,
Singaporean heart-throb, handsome-bugger, Mr. 6/8-packs, "bakla" (ABF)-magnet, Merajuk King, Aly & Sons founder, and resident financial controller

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Boracay is a gorgeous beach paradise with white sandy beaches, immaculately clear water, chic bars playing live music at night and most importantly, lovely people both foreign and local who welcome you with wide open arms. It was unfortunate that Matt couldn’t join us for the water sports, but I’m sure he made the most of his time exploring the rest of the island with the mountain bike he rented.

Farahdi and I met 2 guys named Kristoffer and Mario who initially looked like dodgy water-sport touts trying to suck our wallets dry, but they turned out to be genuinely nice guys who provided us with excellent service at insanely low prices! We eventually signed up for 3 activities: the marine walk (P800 each for 30 minutes), parasailing (P1200 each for 25 minutes) and the ATV [All Terrain Vehicle] ride (P600 each for 1.5hrs).

The marine walk involved climbing down a barge into the seabed about 15-20 metres deep. It is meant for people who aren’t certified divers but yet want to have a firsthand experience amongst colourful fishes and corals. We had to wear an astronaut-like helmet on our heads where a constant supply of Oxygen linked by a tube from the barge helped us breathe deep underwater. Ugly as I looked (Matt: Oh stop the ego-bashing already honey, I'm sure all the Ladyboys of Boracay would wail in disagreement here), I enjoyed the experience, especially when the fishes in a myriad of colours started to nibble on the bread held by my fingers. The disappointing thing about this activity was that we were not allowed to venture out of a 10m radius as the oxygen tubes weren’t long enough. I must say that it will be a good experience for first timers (like me), but if you’ve ever been snorkelling or scuba diving before, you might just want to give this activity a miss.

Parasailing was a very calming and soothing activity. It might seem a little daunting from far to be held up high in the sky by a parachute, but when you’re at it you’ll realise that you won’t actually have any of the “adrenaline pumping, rollercoaster-like” experience. Parasailing was a great way to have a helicopter view of the entire island North to South and East to West. We were both hanging under the same parachute and we truly enjoyed it. The strong winds, the breathtaking views of Boracay on one end, the rolling green mountains of Panay island on the other, and the sweeping views of the vast blue ocean all around us and beneath our feet are certainly good enough reason for anyone to want to try the sport.

After dipping and sunbathing in the sea for a good 2 hours and a light Starbucks meal, we headed for our final day activity- ATV ride! The ATV is this cool, funky looking 4-wheeled vehicle which has motorcycle-like brakes and a push lever as the accelerator. It was a little bit difficult to control the vehicle at the start, but after a while one will naturally get the hang of controlling the ATV along sharp and sometimes steep bends. The trail was paved for most parts of the journey, so don’t expect dirt paths and bumpy rides. The guide (who was on an ATV in front of us all the way) brought us to a butterfly park for P60 each. It was a disappointment – there were almost no butterflies, and all we saw were a few bats and an owl caged up in the enclosure. Farahdi freaked out and I posed for a few pictures with the animals to make the most of my P60. Our next stop was a view at the highest peak of Boracay (Mt. Luhud) which cost us P50 each. I couldn’t help but wonder why they would charge us to climb a few steps up to the vantage point; until I saw caged snakes, peacocks, cat bears and chained monkeys at the entrance – a pathetic attempt to convince us that the P50 we paid was well worth it. An unkempt mini-zoo with malnourished animals right smack at the highest peak of Boracay certainly didn’t go down well with me at least, and I’m sure Farahdi wasn’t impressed as well. Despite the disappointments, I must say that the ATV ride on a whole was quite exhilarating and meant more for thrill seekers. Undoubtedly, we enjoyed the ATV ride the most out of the 3 activities that we experienced for the day. My greatest wish is for the guides to allow for some overtaking and friendly racing along the stretches with lighter traffic, which would have added a whole lot more fun to this already exciting experience.

Credit has to be given to our guide Mario, who was always there to carry our bags, slippers, and belongings. He also took pictures of us tirelessly from the boat and even sitting backwards on the ATV! We were very impressed by the sincerity he showed in his service towards us. He made every effort to ensure that our belongings (which were all over the place) were in safe hands. He never once asked for a tip (we absolutely loathe guides who are thick skinned enough to ask for tips and request for more if they feel not enough is given), and always had this very humble disposition. It was this genuineness in him that moved our hearts and naturally, we tipped him generously after that.

Boracay is certainly worth a visit for water sports or beach lovers, but I must warn you that peak season rates could easily be triple of what we paid for. However, do remember that prices are always negotiable, and it doesn’t hurt to bargain with the touts. Aside from the overcrowded population of transvestites on the island, I have no other complaints to make about the island. One could easily spend the day playing numerous water sports or even touring the island on a scooter or bicycle, and spend the night chilling at a bar by the beach, and lastly, retire into the night stargazing under the moonlight.